Understanding Attachment

Understanding Attachment

I choose to incorporate my understanding of Attachment Theory into my practice because I believe it is the foundation upon which we develop throughout our lives. It is also crucial to understand attachment to effectively treat C-PTSD. The concept of attachment was first developed by John Bowlby (1969) and later expanded by Mary Ainsworth (1978) through her implementation of the Strange Situation study. Bowlby theorized that early caregiving experiences shape our ability to form relationships with others and that these attachment patterns continue to affect us throughout our lives. Ainsworth's work defined three distinct types of attachment: ambivalent (anxious), avoidant, and secure. Later, researchers Main and Solomon (1986) added a fourth attachment style called disorganized-insecure attachment based on their own research. In previous blog posts, I have referred to “templates” that are formed as we develop. These are neural pathways that help us organize and understand the world around us. The following is a description of these relational templates.

Types of Attachment (Secure and Insecure):

Secure Attachment: 

Children who can depend on their caregivers show distress when separated and joy when reunited. Although the child may be upset, they feel assured that the caregiver will return. When frightened, securely attached children are comfortable seeking reassurance from caregivers. This is the most common attachment style and results from what is referred to as “good enough” parenting. “Good enough parenting” is a concept coined by Donald Winnicott (1953), which refers to the type of parenting in which parents respond to the evolving developmental needs of their children in the best way they can, most of the time. It is not a euphemism for “perfect parenting,” which does not exist.

Insecure Attachment:

Insecure attachment styles develop when there is not consistent caregiving that is attuned to the child’s needs. The following are brief descriptions and examples of how children adapt (cope) with the caregiving behavior. There are many psychosocial reasons that can impact a parent's ability to provide “good enough parenting,” including but not limited to socioeconomic status, the impacts of racism, addiction, mental illness, impacts of the criminal justice system, family size, lack of affordable childcare, and housing instability.

Insecure Ambivalent Attachment: 

Children with ambivalent attachment become very distressed when a parent leaves. Due to poor parental availability, these children cannot depend on their primary caregiver to be there when needed. Children with insecure attachment styles experience parents who are at times available and at other times not, consequently leading to a sense of uncertainty and anxiety, which is why this type is commonly referred to as anxious attachment.

Adaptation: Clingy behavior to manage uncomfortable emotions.

Insecure Avoidant Attachment:

Children with avoidant attachment tend to avoid parents or caregivers, showing no preference between a caregiver and a complete stranger. This attachment style might result from emotionally distant, unreliable, or rejecting caregivers. Children who are punished for relying on a caregiver learn to avoid seeking help in the future.

Adaptation: Avoid closeness to manage uncomfortable emotions.

Insecure Disorganized Attachment:

Children with disorganized attachment display a confusing mix of behaviors, appearing disoriented, dazed, or confused. They may avoid or resist the parent. A lack of a clear attachment pattern is likely linked to inconsistent caregiver behavior. In such cases, parents may serve as both a source of comfort and fear, leading to disorganized behavior. Disorganized attachment is often the result of growing up in an abusive, chaotic, or neglectful setting.

Adaptation: Impulsive or aggressive behavior to manage uncomfortable emotions.

The Importance of Attachment:

Attachment is the first developmental task needed to master future tasks like self-regulation, empathy, and being a part of a group. Understanding these attachment styles can help in identifying patterns in relationships and improving caregiving practices to foster secure attachment in children. It is possible to develop C-PTSD after experiencing parenting styles that lead to insecure attachments.

By gaining insight into these attachment styles, we can better understand our own behaviors and relationships, as well as those of the people around us. Recognizing and addressing attachment issues early on can lead to healthier, more secure relationships throughout life. Finally, it is possible to form secure attachments even if your primary attachment style was insecure. For more reading on attachment, you can try the following books:

- For Clients: *Attached* by Amir Levine, Rachel Heller, et al.

- For Clinicians: *Attachment in Psychotherapy* by David J. Wallin, Bob Souer, et al.